Skagit Alpine Club Newsletter– February 2015
Skagit Alpine Club mission statement: "To promote the use and prevent the abuse of outdoor recreation areas"....SAC Articles of Incorporation
Find out more about these positions in Article XIII of the SAC Bylaws, which can be read at skagitalpineclub.com. If you are interested, email Tony Tucker at firstname.lastname@example.org
Wonderful SAC Members That Offered To Bring Snacks & Beverages For All
No one submitted any trip reports this month. Could it be lack of snow? Lack of activity? Lack of Desire? Instead of leaving this section open, blank and lonely... we thought we’d put something in the section about the executive committee. Leading the club is a big deal so it’s important for the members to really understand who the executive committee is and what makes them turn. Please find the complete biographies of the executive committee below.
Tony has the most twisted past. Because of these experiences he is the most excellent candidate to lead the Skagit Alpine Club. He grew up on a farm with his aunt and uncle but dreamt of a rebellious future filled with war and spaceships. As he was going about his perfect life an evil empire came and killed his family. He fled with a smuggler and two robot things that make lots of beeping noises. He ended up having his arm chopped off by his father who was in a severe accident with a weed whacker and had to wear some weird helmet and could have really used an inhaler. His best smuggling friend was casted into a concrete statue and this really fat nasty guy captured this super hot princess who Tony was crushing on until he realized that she was his twin sister. Then this whole horde of bear-like things attacked them until they realized they could all be friends. The bear things were super cute. Tony still manages to climb with one hand and if I hadn’t told you this you wouldn’t have even noticed.
Anna gained her outdoorsy like experiences because of a trip her grandfather took her on as a small child. Young Anna thought she was going to a national park, but little did she know it wasn’t a normal national park. This park had no entrance fees. Also, the park was taken over by mad scientists who used mosquito blood to clone dinosaurs. There is a big storm and some disgruntled computer guy turned off all the security systems and dinosaurs took over the park and started eating people. They tried to eat Anna, but she knows how to lead climb so she set up a bunch of pro, climbed up and hid in a tree until the dinosaurs left. She was able to escape the park and has been enjoying the backcountry ever since.
Most of you don’t know that Alex is actually a prince who was born in the jungle in Africa. As a small lad he was caught in a family feud between his evil uncle and his father. The simple family feud escalated and Alex’s uncle killed his father by throwing him into a wild stampede of antalopes. Alex was young and impressionable and let his uncle believe that it was his fault that his father was crushed to death by antalopes. He fled his hometown and decided to grow up past the savannah with two hippies who had a relaxed view of life. He enjoyed climbing what little there was to offer in the savannahs until his past came to haunt him and he had to face his uncle and bring his village out of cruel dictatorship ruled by his uncle. He did that and now lives happily in Coupeville with a wife and three kids.
Lisa was never known for her sense of direction. In fact, she has been known to get lost backing out of her driveway, so never follow her anywhere. As a small child, Lisa was thrown out her home into the woods because she ate too much for her family to support her. Lisa and her brother tried to leave bread crumbs to find their way back home. Some other hiker ate the crumbs and they were left wandering around the woods. Conveniently enough, they came across a cabin made of candy. They fed on that until an evil old bag captured them. For awhile Lisa and her brother lived in iron cages and ate candy fed by the evil lady, who was fattening them up to eat them later. Then they tricked her and burned her to ashes and escaped. They found their way back home using the old ladies smart phone gps app and then went on a weight loss program and have been climbing ever since, but always bring a map.
Karen is a normal nice person who usually writes up the Newsletters for Skagit Alpine Club. She was out of town this month and may have made a bad decision by assigning Lisa to do it for her. Hopefully Lisa doesn’t get impeached. Tootles.
President – Anthony Tucker email@example.com
Vice President: Alex Kortuem firstname.lastname@example.org
Treasurer – Anna Mostovetsky email@example.com
Secretary - Lisa Rouse firstname.lastname@example.org
Newsletter - Karen Howard email@example.com
Webmaster - Steve Trent firstname.lastname@example.org
Lookout - John and Marie Erbstoeszer email@example.com
Trail Work - Lynn Postler firstname.lastname@example.org
Social Com- Karen Howard email@example.com
Climbing Com - Jonathan Frostad firstname.lastname@example.orgProgram Chair - Christian Phillips